Skip to main content
If I Had Legs I'd Kick You film image; close on crying woman lying on sand

If I Had Legs I'd Kick You

This event has passed

A missing patient. A demonic hamster. A cosmic hole in the bedroom ceiling. For Linda (Rose Byrne), life is a series of surreal catastrophes pointing to her failure as a working mother, and even her therapist (Conan O’Brien) is getting sick of her. Displaced in a purgatorial motel while her husband (Christian Slater) is away on business, Linda turns to weed, white wine, and holotropic breathing to cope with the bottomless void of need that is her daughter’s mysterious illness.

Shot on 35mm film, this darkly humorous psychological drama from writer-director-actor Mary Bronstein (Yeast) immerses us in Linda’s unraveling mental state as her heightened world collapses on itself. Drenched in anxiety and desperate fury, Rose Byrne’s top-notch performance is complemented by impeccable comedic timing from editor Lucian Johnston (Midsommar). Through extreme close-ups, a nerve-wracking soundscape, eerie ambient lighting, and visceral practical effects, If I Had Legs I’d Kick You reflects the frantic perspective of a mother at the end of her rope.

 

Silver Bear for Best Leading Performance (Rose Byrne), Berlinale 2025

Director
Cast

Rose Byrne, Conan O’Brien, A$AP Rocky, Danielle Macdonald

Credits
Country of Origin

USA

Year

2025

Language

English

Film Contact
18+

At International Village

19+

At The Rio

113 min
Award Winners Drama Family Relations Women Directors
A24

Book Tickets

This event has passed.

Credits & Director

Executive Producer

Mary Bronstein, Rose Byrne

Producer

Sara Murphy, Ryan Zacarias, Ronald Bronstein, Josh Safdie, Eli Bush, Conor Hannon, Richie Doyle

Screenwriter

Mary Bronstein

Cinematography

Christopher Messina

Editor

Lucian Johnston

Production Design

Carmen Navis

Mary Bronstein headshot

Mary Bronstein

Mary Bronstein is a writer-director based in New York City who is known for her raw style, auteurist approach, and focus on stories about complicated women. Her best-known work is the cult-classic Yeast (2008), and Mary recently completed her second feature, If I Had Legs I’d Kick You, with A24. In addition to her film work, she’s written original feminist theory for several academic publishers.

Filmography: Yeast (2008)

Photo by Issey Goold

 

Missing VIFF? Check out what's playing at the VIFF Centre

Frankenstein

Dir. Guillermo del Toro
149 min

Frankenstein and Guillermo del Toro might have been made for each other. The movie does not disappoint, a ripping yarn of grand adventure, spectacle, hubris, passion and XXL body parts, a tale of the fantastic that rings the imagination. Screening in 35mm.

VIFF Centre - VIFF Cinema

Predators

Dir. David Osit
96 min

"Punk'd for pedophiles." That's what Jimmy Kimmel called Chris Hansen's true crime/reality TV show, To Catch a Predator (2004-07). Two decades on, David Osit examines why the show made such an impact, for good or ill, and sits down with Hansen himself.

VIFF Centre - Lochmaddy Studio Theatre

You Are Not My Mother

Dir. Kate Dolan
93 min

One of the best horror films of recent years, from anywhere, Kate Dolan's film finds a chilling angle on a mother-daughter relationship.

VIFF Centre - Lochmaddy Studio Theatre
More info

Sold Out

Fréwaka

Dir. Aislinn Clarke
103 min

A Dublin nurse is sent to a remote Irish village to care for a reclusive woman. Haunted by a dark past, her night terrors invade her reality. Aislinn Clarke delivers a chilling, feminist folk horror that favours atmosphere over jump scares.

VIFF Centre - Lochmaddy Studio Theatre

Checkpoint Zoo

Dir. Joshua Zeman
107 min

The amazing true story of the rescue of thousands of animals trapped on the frontline at an Ecopark when Russia invades Ukraine in 2022.

VIFF Centre - Lochmaddy Studio Theatre

An Taibhse (The Ghost)

Dir. John Farrelly
92 min

A winter caretaker and his troubled teenage daughter take up residence in a remote country mansion in this harrowing mid-19th century Irish makeover of The Shining.

VIFF Centre - Lochmaddy Studio Theatre
More info

Sold Out